Friday, July 25, 2003

In chemistry, in order to begin a reaction, one needs to add a certain amount of activation energy. This process can be lengthy or quick, depending upon the chemicals at play and the existence of a catalyst that lowers the required activation energy.

My job search process has been slow because it seems like no catalyst exists in my situation, that I have to keep exerting more effort to get to the top of the hill of energy. It just seems to me that fuel keeps leaking, that winds keep blowing the flame out, because things are getting even harder, and time is running out. The more time I spend in here, I become more socially passive and inept.

I just wish I could just get a good lead. I received a call yesterday morning from a headhunter for biomedical companies in North Jersey. Apparently, he found my resume off of my Monster posting. That was an encouraging moment for me, to see that at least someone took notice in my resume. However, I'm a bit flustered with how muc more I have to go. God, it'll only be God that can place me in the right place.

Tuesday, July 22, 2003

Well, I've fallen back to the old groove again. Throughout college, I conceived and finally started this website with the purpose of showing the Christian life in full honesty, and to show the regenerate life enduring the flames of life's furnace. However, I didn't realize what flames would come, or in what intensity. What intensity, what intensity!

Flames of sadness, flames of fear
Burned my confidence into fine ashes.

Can I be the phoenix that rises after death's summon? I must get up, I must. I must face the fear of confrontation of the unknown; will I face it with boldness, will I face it alone? Will I face my fear with abandon, or will my bravado turn to stone?

A sign, a sign, I asked for a sign. If I see it, will it truly make a difference?

Monday, July 21, 2003

The Mazda event was excellent. What a rush!

****

I just watched the first two movies in the original "Planet of the Apes" series.

Don't watch beyond the first movie. The second one reeked of cheese; in attempting to take itself seriously, it ended up making a fool of itself. With lines like, "All hail the holy bomb, in the fellowship of the holy fallout!", why even bother?